How Grateful Children Make for Happy Parents

What if we told you that moms are happier when their kids express gratitude? According to a new study from the Journal of Positive Psychology, just hearing your child say thank you can reduce your stress level and improve your mental well-being.

That should be reason enough to keep teaching your kids to say, “thank you,” but according to this study and others, that’s not the only reason. Keep reading to learn how expressing gratitude is good for you and your kids.

According to Dr. Rajasekhar Kannali, a psychiatrist with Novant Health who recently spoke with Fox News, hearing your child say, “thank you” reduces stress because it affirms that parents are training their children well. Hearing your child express gratitude also helps you by

• Reducing feelings of being overwhelmed
• Reducing feelings of being exhausted
• Improving  feelings that parents are valued/appreciated
• Improving parent/child bonding
• Improving parent’s outlook on parenting
• Fostering a culture of appreciation
• Creating a better family dynamic
• Creating a more fulfilling home environment
• Reinforcing parents’ efforts
• Reminding parents that love and dedication to teaching children have a positive impact on children
• Encouraging a feedback loop where parents are more likely to reinforce positive behaviors in their children
• Encouraging parents to be a better parents and spouses

A literature review in Developmental Review points out that grateful children generally have caring and supportive parents who show gratitude themselves and work to build bonds with their children. Better child/parent relationships

• Help children grow emotionally and socially
• Improve children’s resiliency
• Lead to better problem solving
• Help children handle challenges better
• Lead to stronger social connections

Additionally, when our children learn to feel and express gratitude, they

• Are happier and more satisfied with their lives/have better mental health in general
• Feel valued and accepted
• Appreciate kindnesses from others more
• Appreciate their own abilities more
• Are better able to handle stress
• Are more motivated to improve themselves
• Have better interpersonal relationships

Our goals in teaching gratitude are to help children learn to be satisfied with what they have and to instill gratitude as a core value. Studies show it’s important for parents to model gratitude as well as teach it. Expressing gratitude to and in front of our children shows them the value of appreciating a gift or a kindness.

Because learning gratitude involves the region of the brain that is important for social informational processing and emotional regulation, some parents think young children can’t understand what it means to be grateful. But it is important to know you can begin to instill a sense of gratitude in young children, and the best way to do it is to talk to them about small moments of joy. Parents who intentionally design environments promoting positive behaviors such as gratitude help kids internalize those values. Other ways to teach young children include

• Discussing your child’s feelings – especially after someone has done something nice for your child or given him or her a gift
• Encouraging empathy
• Celebrating efforts in addition to outcomes
• Creating gratitude rituals (maybe taking time each evening to name something you’re grateful for)
• Avoiding overindulgence
• Helping to create a lifelong appreciation for people and experiences

Still not convinced? Maybe these physical benefits of expressing gratitude will do the trick! Feeling appreciative

• Improves sleep
• Improves your immune system
• Increases happiness
• Increases life satisfaction
• Lowers blood pressure
• Lowers depression
• Lowers anxiety
• Potentially alters biomarkers of risk for cardiovascular disease

So now you know. Instilling gratitude in your child is good for both you and your child. And if you haven’t started yet, Thanksgiving is the perfect time to begin teaching your child to be thankful.

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